4 Reasons You’re Miserable at Work…and What to Do About It

Do you hate your job? Are you miserable at work? Do you get the “Sunday scaries” and dread the office on Monday? Are you wondering if it’s time to throw in the towel?

Miserable at work? Don't give up hope! Here are four reasons why your job makes you miserable and what you can do to turn it around.

 


 

Many of us are looking at our job satisfaction and wondering if we shouldn’t be getting more out of our work. We may think of moving on but feel afraid of the career and financial consequences. So we trudge in each day, accepting that we’re doomed to feel miserable at work.

If you’re unhappy at work, there are a few points to examine. Here’s why you might be so dissatisfied with your job.

Is It Me or Is it the Job?

As a coach, I often hear people complain about their job situation. Many people have told me that they’re miserable at work. But what does that really mean?


Underneath that misery could often be feelings of frustration, anger, hurt, and even boredom. It turns out we feel more satisfied when we’re challenged.


When we’re just going through the motions, trying to make it through the day, it might be time for a step back.

The first question is—does work have to be miserable? After all, it’s called work, not fun, right? Absolutely not! I’ve worked with hundreds of people who were satisfied, stimulated, and purpose-driven in their work. They had fulfilling job experiences, whether they were a CEO, an entry-level intern, or serving up coffee behind a counter.

4 Reasons Why We’re Miserable at Work

When we look at our mindset, we can often turn those feelings of being miserable at work into feelings of fulfillment, growth, and betterment. Are we getting in the way of our career satisfaction? Here are a few reasons we might feel miserable at work.

1. You’re Not Taking Personal Responsibility for Your Own Happiness

We are all responsible for our own actions. But what does personal responsibility at work mean?

Taking personal responsibility is the act of declaring: “I determine how I react to the world. I am responsible for my own self-care. I don’t expect others to take care of me, AND I take responsibility for my emotional responses.” In our work life, we could also add, “I’m personally responsible for giving work my all, every day.”


When we feel miserable at work, we should ask ourselves if we’re really pushing ourselves. Have we become stagnant in our work? Are we learning and growing with new challenges? If not, how can we take personal responsibility to ask for more challenging, engaging tasks?


When we don’t take personal responsibility, we enter a state of victimhood. We get stuck in a drama triangle, where we’re the helpless victim. We stop analyzing our situation and making choices to become more effective and happier. Instead, we are disempowered, in a hole of our own unhappiness. We’re blaming others for our problems without doing our part to improve our situation.

It turns out that people who are unhappy at work are often the same people with the least to do. Boredom is anger turned inward. When people take that attitude to work, they aren’t set up for success. They’re spinning their tires on the ice rather than moving forward and accomplishing tasks. When we face challenges and complete a task for the day, we feel accomplished and excited. These achievements lead to pride, joy, and job satisfaction.

Personal responsibility is about understanding that we each own our emotions and reactions at all times. We can make work a fun game or see it as drudgery. For example, I once hired an acquaintance and two temps to help with an envelope-stuffing project. The work was monotonous, but the acquaintance would stuff 300 envelopes at a time. When he finished his goal, he’d reward himself with a quick walk outside or a snack. Then he’d come back a get right back to work.

On the other hand, the temps viewed the task as dull and frustrating. My acquaintance ended up stuffing more envelopes than the two temps combined. He was much happier too. He didn’t complain or blame the task. Instead, he got to work and turned it into a game.

If we want more satisfaction at work, we must start to shift our perspective about what’s “fun.” How can we set a goal and work towards it? Setting a timer, creating a milestone, or seeing how efficiently we can complete a task can make the time pass quickly and leave us feeling satisfied.

2. You Have Authority Issues

When we were kids, we may have heard that we had a problem with authority. It happens to many people, me included. Like many of our childhood memories and ideas, our pushback and rebellious streak can continue to manifest in adulthood.


But just because our boss is bossy (or even a jerk—and they are out there), it doesn’t mean we need to be unhappy. We need to look at how we’re reacting and get honest with ourselves.


If we have issues with authority (if we’ve had similar feelings whenever someone else is in charge), we’ll probably react to any boss, supervisor, or manager in a volatile way. Whether that means we shut down and withdraw or resist and defend, we’re likely to face continuous conflict unless we explore our feelings.

There are two steps we can take to get a handle on our authority issues:

First Step: We can deal with our unfinished business. All of us carry unfinished business with us. These issues are often unresolved from our childhood (even if we had happy childhoods), and they can come up when we experience feelings of powerlessness or frustration.

Yes, our “jerk boss” might be overly aggressive or even a bully because he’s unhappy with himself. But we don’t have control over that. We can only control our actions and reactions. Some folks can really struggle with this area, and it’s essential to get to the root of the problem. It could stem from residual childhood issues with authority. Perhaps our boss brings up negative feelings we had about someone in our past (an older sibling, a teacher). Becoming aware of these emotions and projections helps us get on the right path to control our reactions and make confrontations constructive.

Second Step: Deal with it. It may sound harsh, but sometimes we face people who are just jerks. If we’ve done work to become conscious of our projections and emotional reaction, but our boss is still a problematic bully, then the real question is—is it worth it? Can we deal with it? Can we put aside the feelings and work with this person productively?


When we focus on effectively doing our job rather than the emotional ups and downs of the day, we might find a greater sense of empowerment and control.


We can ask about our performance and spark a conversation with our boss down the road. This presents a less-heated opportunity to confront our boss about their attitude honestly and openly.

How will the boss react? They may respond positively or negatively, but when we’ve honestly expressed our feelings in a responsible manner, we own them. Our boss may not listen, and they may not change, but these opportunities can teach us powerful lessons about our inner strength, skillset, and even how to do a better job. If the situation is genuinely unworkable, then it may be time to liberate ourselves from the job and find something that’s a better fit.

3. You Aren’t Recognizing and Honoring Emotions

Sometimes our misery at work doesn’t stem from our boss or the drudgery of the job. Sometimes we feel miserable at work because we aren’t connecting with others—customers, vendors, and coworkers. We’re letting our emotions take over without examining their origins.

Take, for example, if we feel really angry at a coworker. When we engage our emotional intelligence, we own, examine, and understand our emotions. We explore where our anger comes from, and we own our part in it. As a result, we can engage in productive, honest conflict with the other person and find a proactive way to resolve the situation. We can learn and grow from every interaction, thus nourishing our emotional and social intelligence.

Where do these emotions and projections come from? Childhood lessons and values can project onto our adult selves and influence our interactions with others. People often become their childhood selves while interacting with those who remind them of certain family members or friends. One person may stir feelings of comfort and happiness—like a favorite aunt. Another person may evoke feelings of inadequacy, like our demanding dad.

When we examine everyone we have issues with at work, we might discover some distinct familiarities with our relatives and friends from the past. Examine these issues to determine what we might be projecting onto others, whether good or bad. Recognizing our emotions can help those emotional intelligence skills grow.

4. You Don’t Have Social Intelligence Skills

Social and emotional intelligence skills help us understand people’s emotions and reactions. Social intelligence is the ability to understand what other people are feeling, then learning to influence them positively and productively.

If we want to explore our social intelligence skills, we can ask ourselves questions like:

  • Am I a contributing team member?
  • Do I ensure my colleagues are working effectively?
  • Do I support the team?
  • Am I helping everyone win by contributing?
  • Am I open and honest in communications with everyone at the company?
  • Do I try to better both my work and myself?

Some people lack social intelligence skills because they lack emotional intelligence too. They don’t understand their emotions and reactions. One leads to the other, and both skills are essential for happiness and satisfaction in work and life.

For example, if we feel like we’re on a team that drags us down, we can turn it around and ask, “What have I done to lift my team today?” That’s part of that social and emotional intelligence in practice. If we take responsibility for ourselves, even when others are not, we can be socially aware and carefully, responsibly, and clearly communicate our feelings. We can start to understand our colleagues and how they might react and then engage with them accordingly.

How to Stop Being Miserable at Work

All these reasons go hand-in-hand with why we might feel miserable at work. I’m not interested in just helping people be “happier” at work. I’m interested in helping them have a wildly successful career of fulfillment and satisfaction. Most of us won’t be happy every day with every task, but we can shift our mindset to find purpose in every task.

The 4 reasons for being miserable at work are in a very specific order for a reason. The first step is taking responsibility for ourselves. Then we must deal with our authority issues, increase our emotional awareness, and build our social and emotional intelligence.

Learning these social and emotional intelligence skills allows us to create joyous work, practice gratitude, learn and grow in an adventuresome way. We will discover more about ourselves, others, and our world every day.

To build up your career satisfaction, don’t miss the courses available at Wright Now. We have insightful resources to help you increase your satisfaction in your relationships, career, and with yourself. Don’t miss the opportunity to live a life of more!


About the Author

Dr. Bob Wright

Dr. Bob Wright is an internationally recognized visionary, educator, program developer, leadership and sales executive, best-selling author and speaker. He is a co-founder of Wright and the Wright Graduate University.


Learn more about Wright Living’s Career & Leadership Coaching in Chicago & Career Coaching Courses in Chicago.

Wright Living is a division of the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential, a leadership institute located in Chicago, Illinois. Wright Living performative learning programs are integrated into the curriculum at Wright Graduate University.

How to Be a Leader Wherever You Are

Many of us want to be a leader—at work, at home, amongst our social group. But we may assume that we’re not in a position to lead.


Be the boss outside of work too. The Wright Foundation can teach you how to be a leader wherever you are.


Maybe we’re new to the group. Maybe we’re around people whose personalities are more assertive and more dominant. Perhaps we’re just starting a job at the entry level.

The truth is that we can be a leader wherever we are. So what does it take to be a leader? The capabilities are inside all of us. It’s a matter of unlocking our inner-leader and learning how to build rapport with the group.

Today we’ll explore what it takes to be a leader and how to be a leader from any position. If you’re ready to take the reins, here’s what you need to know.

Identifying Leadership Opportunities

When should we step up to lead? Is it appropriate to lead in any situation, or do we need a signal, title, or training to be a leader?


Leadership opportunities present themselves all the time—both in our careers and in our personal lives. We may not realize it, but we can embrace an opportunity to lead in almost any situation.


I’ve talked to people struggling to discover their inner leader—people wrestling with leadership conundrums in their lives, even if they aren’t the highest-paid person on the payroll.

Leadership is within each of us, and there are chances to lead in any situation. Any time we’re in a group, we’re presented with an opportunity to be a leader. Will the group always respond positively to our leadership? Not always, but as we learn how to build transformational leadership skills, we’ll start to lead in a way that inspires at motivates. When we lead with emotional intelligence, we help each group member bring out their vision and their best—including our own.

So the big question is: what is a transformational leader? What does it take to lead with vision, inspiration, and emotional intelligence?

Transformational leaders display certain universal qualities. To be a leader, we don’t need to be the funniest person in the room, the loudest, the smartest, or even the most inventive. Transformational leaders can motivate others because they engage with them. They see each person on the team and help them bring out their best.

A transformational leader:

  1. Walks the talk—they do what they say, keep their commitments, and lead with integrity.
  2. Has a sense of vision, and they share that vision with those around them.
  3. Are interested in the well-being of each individual in the group. They keep everyone engaged.

When we see a transformational leader at work, we might notice they don’t walk in the room and demand attention. Instead, they command attention. There’s a subtle but significant difference. Commanding attention means listening and engaging with others. It doesn’t mean getting their ideas out first or with the most confidence and bravado. The best leaders are good at getting things done because they are open to all possibilities. They allow everyone in the group to bring their very best to the table.

Leaders Understand Culture on Multiple Levels

We hear a lot about culture these days—whether it’s a discussion on a person’s background and culture of origin, the company culture, or the zeitgeist of the moment. If we want to discover what it takes to be a leader, we need to understand culture from all aspects. There’s a lot of reward for those who understand culture—not only in terms of their teams. Many consultants are highly paid to help business leaders understand company culture and shore up gaps for their employees.


Transformational leaders understand the culture of the country where they’re working. They know the city’s culture, the company culture, and the culture of every individual in their purview.


Successful businesses get that way because their leadership understands the importance of culture to their organization. Culture is an unspoken society, rules, and atmosphere of an organization. It’s the personality.

In any group where we want to lead, we need to connect with the culture of each member. Culture is different than understanding their race or religion. It’s about engaging in a deeper understanding of what makes them tick. When we connect with someone on that level, we can truly bring out their best. We start to understand their motivations, their fears, their concerns, and their needs. We prioritize their well-being and see them for who they are.

The company’s rules, roles, and expectations must be clearly outlined for all of those operating within those parameters. As the organization’s culture builds and grows, employees should start to identify and understand the culture. When I hear complaints about employee behavior, it’s often because the employees are operating with no idea what the rules and expectations of management really are. The parameters haven’t been defined, and the culture is nebulous and unclear. If the expectations aren’t clearly outlined, we aren’t setting up our group for success.

How to Be a Leader and Motivate a Team

We’ve all been part of a team where everyone is pissing and moaning about the way things are done. They complain about the expectations of management. Nothing productive happens. It’s incredibly frustrating.

When a transformational leader is stationed with a group of whiners, they don’t fuel the fire. They acknowledge the feelings of the group and listen, but they don’t contribute to the frustration. Instead, they focus on the future. When we’re faced with a situation where everyone is feeling demotivated, we can say something like, “I know no one is happy about the situation. We can either figure out a way to get it done professionally and productively, or we can piss and moan and spin our wheels. So what are our next steps?”

Whether we’re faced with a room of two-year-olds or forty-two-year-olds, offering a choice is always motivating. No one (at any age) likes to be told what they must do. People don’t respond well to orders and barked directions. Instead, we can articulate the dilemma, understand and acknowledge the feelings of the group, and then help them choose to move forward and stay productive.

If we opt to relate by joining in on the whining and collusion, we keep it going. We continue to perpetuate the cycle of unproductive behavior. It’s far better (and more efficient) to acknowledge and validate feelings and move forward with the plan. The project may indeed be daunting and even unpleasant. Team members may validly be upset at the situation. All feelings are valid (there are no bad or wrong feelings), but when we must move forward, it doesn’t help to dwell in the negative space.

Instead, we can appeal to the group’s hearts and minds. Alfred Adler theorized that by giving people a choice, we help create motivation. A choice invites people to feel self-respect and gives them a chance to jump in and offer new solutions to the problem.

Be a Leader by Understanding & Connecting

When people feel unmotivated, it can indicate that they’re out of touch with their emotional intelligence. In many cases, they may be holding back out of fear. Either they fear failure or fear that they aren’t being heard and their needs aren’t being met.


Every person yearns for certain things. They may yearn to be seen and heard, yearn for respect, love, security. Transformational leaders understand those yearnings and acknowledge them. They understand people’s fears and concerns and reassure them that they’re being heard.


We can still take a leadership role when we’re part of a group where we aren’t the designated leader. For example, when our manager or boss is faced with a naysayer or an adversary, we can support them in what they’re saying. We can show that we’re behind them and rooting for the success of the entire team. I’ve been in many situations where a whole room will start to hear someone out simply because they see me supporting the speaker and siding with them.

There will always be people who will balk at leadership and management. In any given situation, there will likely be pushback. Sometimes it’s for a good reason—for example, someone isn’t leading with values or integrity. Other times it’s because the team member is negative and difficult. Rather than allowing those negative people to dominate the conversation, we can co-lead by helping the group support and align with the leader’s vision.

When management sees how we support them and share their vision, they’ll listen with respect and hold us in the same regard. When we use our leadership skills to bring out our best and the best of those around us, we can succeed in any situation.

If you’re ready to discover more about yourself and unlock your leadership skills, don’t miss our courses at Wright Now. We have many different resources and online classes to help you discover more about your career, relationships, and yourself. Start getting more out of life today!

 

Getting Along with Coworkers: Here’s Why It’s All Relative

Is getting along with coworkers a tall order? Do you ever struggle, wondering why your coworkers drive you up a wall?

 

You can get along with coworkers and create a work family.

 


 

We often hear people lament about their coworkers, not realizing that their relationships with their peers often mirror their other relationships with friends and family. People claim that they’re totally different at work, or their work lives look nothing like their home lives.

But then they face the same types of disagreements in both places. Here’s why it’s crucial to examine your relationships across all aspects of your life, especially if you’re having a tough time getting along with coworkers.

Creating Our Work Family

“I just don’t understand why my coworker bugs me so much.”

“I work in an office with so much drama. UGH. I hate it!”

“I’m a completely different person when I’m at the office.”

Do you ever wonder why getting along with coworkers is so hard? It may be time to take a look at your relationships in the rest of your life. The truth is, we’re the same everywhere. Chances are if you’re bothered by certain types of people, or if you fall into the drama triangle at work, you’ve probably seen the same patterns at home. Like it or not, pleasing your boss and getting along with your coworkers often mirrors the dynamics you experience with your family.


We spend much of our time at work. So, it’s natural we would build strong relationships. Many people find they’ve recreated their family relationships and dynamics at the office after years at work.


That hard-to-please mother? She’s your boss. Your easy-going relationship with your dad? You might see the same dynamic at play with your favorite manager. That coworker who pushes your buttons and pisses you off? He has the same traits as your brother (and probably gets under your skin for the same reasons).

We automatically recreate our expectations of the world and our relationships right there in our office from 9-5. So, if you want to start getting along with your coworkers, it’s important to remember—the dynamics are all relative!

The Hierarchy of Authority at the Office

Within most workplaces, there is a hierarchy of authority. Well, guess what—growing up, we also experienced a hierarchy of authority. For most of us, the authority came from our parents, but no matter how our family was structured, there was a power dynamic at play.

In most households, Mom and Dad were the first authority figures in your life. Your relationship with them is reflected in your relationships with your coworkers and feelings toward authority figures throughout your life (whether you like it or not).

Let’s say you had authoritarian parents who were very demanding. Well, you probably learned to resist them. Possibly, you learned to passive-aggressively resist them by not doing exactly what they wanted. Or you learned to openly get mad and fight them. Welcome to your authority issues today.


If you were competitive or in conflict with your parents, you’re probably going to struggle at the office when you feel bossed around (which is, as we all know, a natural part of work).


If your parents were inconsistent and the hierarchy and the power balance between you were hard to figure out, you’ll often see this same scenario play out again as authority issues at work. You may struggle to figure out your boss. You may feel the need to question your manager or balk at orders and instructions. Or you may put on an air of agreeability but bemoan the orders the moment your manager is out the door.

All these reactions speak volumes about the way you view authority today, as well as the authority you were raised with when you were growing up. Eventually, you’ll face similar feelings in the workplace to those you experienced in your childhood and felt toward your parents. It’s a natural, normal part of human behavior.

But What if Your Boss is a Jerk?

Many people realize they have authority issues but identify the problem as, “my boss is a jerk.” When we pin the problem entirely on the personality of our boss, we fail to recognize these issues stem from and exist within us. Don’t like your situation at work? You have the power to explore and change your relationship with authority.

You were born in your family issues—long before you had any say in the matter. But recognizing this truth will help empower you. Even if your boss or coworkers are vastly different from your parents, you will eventually create and experience the same patterns over and over again that you played out during your childhood. It’s essential to explore these dynamics and their origin, especially if you’re finding it challenging to get along with your coworkers.

Another family pattern that’s become especially common these days is what we refer to as the super enmeshed family. This is where the family is overly involved in a person’s life, and they fail to separate once they reach adulthood. The enmeshment stems from parents who are highly focused on the happiness of their kids.

While wanting your kids to be happy is positive, it’s possible to pin your identity and focus entirely on your children. What ends up happening with super enmeshed parents is their kids don’t know if they’re living for their own happiness or their parents’ happiness. We’re seeing this type of dynamic more and more in the age of the “helicopter parent.”


What happens to those who grew up in super enmeshed families? We see people who grow into middle age without ever really becoming adults. They never truly disconnect from their parents and learn to function as whole, adult human beings.


This plays out in relationships with friends and family, at work, and even within romantic relationships. This over-parenting leads to a lack of independence, confidence, and ability to make decisions.

So, what does this mean for you? Do you want to break free from the patterns? Do you believe they don’t affect you? Well, first of all, tough luck.

You take your family everywhere. It’s impossible to avoid recreating the dynamics because it’s an integral part of your programming and part of human nature. You will find your parents’ traits in others throughout your life. If you can’t find the traits of your parents right away within the people you meet, then you’ll recreate those relationship dynamics as your connection develops.

No matter what your relationship with your parents was like (and there are no perfect parents out there, so if you think your parents were “saints,” think again), you will see this play out in your relationships later. We call this your unfinished business.

Understanding Your Unfinished Business to Start Getting Along with Coworkers

The realization we’re carrying around our familial issues is tough to take. Most of us don’t love the idea. It may even make us feel angry. The good news in all of this is your work relationships create an excellent opportunity to explore your unfinished business and apply personal growth lessons in the real world.

If we’re interested in learning, growing, and becoming more complete human beings, then our work relationships provide us with an excellent chance to really explore our dynamics with others. At work, you have a perfect laboratory of sorts to look at how your relationships play out; to think about how getting along with your coworkers or not getting along with coworkers mirrors your connections with your family members.

In an ideal setting, you are the authority in your own life. You embrace the power within you, and consequentially, you fully acknowledge the authority of those over you, such as in a work setting, without resentment. In fact, in an ideal situation you, empower those authorities without undue competitiveness or anger.

But of course, most of us still have growing to do. We have unfinished business to address!


We all face a challenge to become whole and complete human beings. It’s incumbent on each of us to address our unfinished business so we become more honest and straightforward communicators.


It’s not about simply “tolerating” or getting along with your coworkers, but rather digging in and understanding why you click (or why you don’t click).

One of the best steps we can take to improve and understand our work life is to realize that our work dynamics are relative—a direct reflection of our family of origin.

Work gives us a great sandbox to experiment with these dynamics and explore our connections. So, look around at the people you like a lot at work. Who do those people remind you of in your family? Then take a look at the people who get under your skin. Who do they remind you of? Push yourself to explore the lesson at hand. What immaturity and unfinished business are you bringing to the office?

For more on building your relationships and power at work, explore our courses available on Wright Now. We offer an array of webinars and virtual classes to help you connect with others and learn more about yourself.

 


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The Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential is a leadership institute located in Chicago, Illinois. Wright Living performative learning programs are integrated into the curriculum at Wright Graduate University.

 

 

Find Your Strengths to Get Ahead at Work

 

We all have skills, right? I bet you can probably list them right off your resume.


You might think I mean typing or data entry or understanding HTML—and sure, those certainly are skills, but they’re not what really makes you shine.

I’m not even talking about the things you studied in school or even what you went to college for—although, I’m sure what you’ve learned has helped you on your career path as well. Whether you’re a nurse or a teacher, or if you have an MBA, you’ve probably acquired some very job-specific skills.

While these skills are useful and will serve you well, they’re not what will really make you stand out from all the other nurses or teachers or managers. Those skills are important, but they won’t help you get ahead.

I’m not talking about those “resume skills”…I’m talking about strengths. To be successful, we each have to identify our own unique strengths.

Our strengths come from our personality profile.

You might be a great sales guy or gal and maybe you know how to close a deal like no other.

Maybe they call you in when they need to pull a team together and rally the troops. Perhaps you have the ability to create harmony in any situation.

Or maybe you’re a cheerleader who can bring energy to every project and get the whole team excited about performing.

Perhaps you’re the type who can assess a problem, target a solution and organize technical data without becoming overwhelmed…and maybe you even like it?

These strengths are inherent to YOU. They’re the things that make you special and differentiate you from the rest of the crowd at your office. They’re your social intelligence skills. They help you communicate with others and they shape the way you engage and interact with those around you. These strengths are the “energy” you bring to your team.

There are four core personality types—Cooperator, Analyzer, Regulator, and Energizer (what we call the C.A.R.E. profile). For some of us, we may be surprised to learn our strengths aren’t where we thought.

The sooner you find your strengths, the sooner you’ll be on your way to advocating for yourself, building on your strengths, and overcoming areas that are not-so-strong. The sooner you identify your strengths, the sooner you’ll find your inner leader. Once you know your personality type, you’re taking your first steps toward emerging into your next, most radiant self.

Discover Your Leadership

Are you a leader?

Maybe you don’t think of yourself as someone who stands out. You might be an introvert. You might dread dealing with crowds or public speaking. Maybe the thought of talking in a meeting is enough to turn your stomach (or at least make you sweat).

Guess what? We can ALL be leaders. Each and every person has leadership within them. That’s right! Every person has the ability to bring a team together and inspire others to greatness. YOU can engage, you can listen, and you can inspire! You can lead from wherever you are.

Not everyone has to be the person who rallies the troops (the Energizer), or the one that goes in to make a hard sale (the Regulator)—but whether you’re leading your fellow IT members through a successful data mapping or you’re leading the nurses on your wing to more efficient procedures, there’s leadership within every person.

Learning to work within your personality type to play up your strengths and compensate for areas that might be less comfortable for you is part of increasing your social and emotional intelligence. The foundation and ability to achieve greatness is within each and every one of us.

We are all gifts. We bring our experiences, our knowledge, our strengths and our personality into each situation. We have a blend of experiences that’s uniquely our own. We can draw on those pieces in each new interaction and situation.

To discover your inner leader, you need to unlock your communication abilities and keep working on your social intelligence. Build on your personality strengths and use them as a launch pad for growth. Social intelligence helps you read and interact effectively with different personalities. It helps you “get along” with others…and it also helps you stand out from the crowd.


“We are all designed to live great lives. It is through being socialized that we limit our capacity. The good news is that we can reignite this natural capacity. We have no doubt that you’re capable of greatness. This is not starry-eyed optimism but pragmatic certainty. We’ve coached and trained many people who’ve achieved spectacular results in every area of their lives. They have learned to transform—that is, to consciously reignite their capacity to live ever-greatening lives.

If you think you want…to discover your next most radiant self, then get ready to have more fun, but also to get hurt more. There is no safety from pain—just a commitment to learning and growing from it. Radiance can take the form of laughter…Your next most radiant self will also be more open and less defensive and resistant, so you’ll experience more flow and aliveness. You’ll become increasingly real, sharing your pain and your joy, your anger and your fear, your gifts and your foibles. By continually developing emotional and social intelligence, you negotiate life’s inevitable knocks and problems with greater ease and benefits.”

Transformed! The Science of Spectacular Living


Is unlocking our personal strengths an easy task? Is it simple to discover our own personal power?

Yes and no. Transformation isn’t a switch you turn on and off, but a lifelong journey. Once you become your next most radiant self, you might realize there’s a NEXT even MORE radiant you beyond that, and beyond that…

Fortunately, as humans we have unlimited potential for greatness. We have the gift of neuroplasticity—the ability to grow and adapt our brains over time. When we reach adulthood, we don’t stop growing or learning, and in fact, the more we grow and learn the greater our capacity!

If you feel like you’ve stifled your inner leader, or you have the skills for the job but aren’t quite able to extract the leadership from your personality, examine where you fall on the profile, and use it as a guide to help you strengthen your social and emotional intelligence.

Within each person is a great leader. Find your strengths and challenge yourself to embrace them and you’re on your way to unlocking your next most radiant self!

For more on building your leadership, visit www.wrightliving.com. Go forth and ignite your world for a better tomorrow.


About the Author

Judith

Dr. Judith Wright is a media favorite, sought-after inspirational speaker, respected leader, peerless educator, bestselling author, & world-class coach. She is a co-founder of Wright and the Wright Graduate University.


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Wright Living is a division of the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential, a leadership institute located in Chicago, Illinois. Wright Living performative learning programs are integrated into the curriculum at Wright Graduate University.

New Year, New Start: Revive and Refresh Your Career Passion

When we ring in the New Year, we often feel an excitement and zest for the potential of what’s to come. A New Year means 365 days of possibilities, new connections & opportunities to learn, connect & thrive.

The new year brings new starts and a new opportunity to create new career goals. Learn to revive and refresh your career passion.


 

Do you love what you do for a living? This question often comes up this time of year, so we start doing some self-assessment.

Sometimes we can also feel reflective and even a little sad or nostalgic. We might have regrets from the past year or unfinished goals we set out to accomplish but came up short. Even if you don’t subscribe to the tradition of setting “New Year’s Resolutions,” it’s impossible to avoid the sense of putting the prior year to bed and moving into a new beginning where you anticipate new actions you’ll need to take.

The New Year is full of untapped potential just waiting for us.

Revise Resolutions All Year Long

Resolutions aren’t simply for the New Year, though. When we only visit our vision and goals one time a year, we’re surely setting ourselves up for some missed opportunities and regret.

To operate at peak performance, our brains prefer constant learning, growth, and stimulation. When things get stale and stagnant, our brains actually become dulled and subdued. We have to have new experiences, master new skills and professional development opportunities, and seek out chances to stretch ourselves and find our spark.

Our resolutions, whether for the New Year or otherwise, give us a chance to set goals and push ourselves toward the things we want. They give us a chance to check in with our inner “coordinator” and self-governance. Are we really working toward the things most important to our hearts? What steps are we taking to achieve what we want and to get to our next goal?

We should constantly and consistently be revisiting our goals and focusing on our vision to keep moving forward to the next peak. Our vision is our big-picture map and guide.

ENGAGE and Get Back to the Fun Side of Work

When we discover new possibilities on the horizon or when we’re at the beginning of a journey, we must first identify what we want: the deep drivers that we call our yearnings. If our vision is the big picture, then our yearnings are our inner-GPS.

Yearnings are deeper than simple wants. I might want to make money at my job, but I yearn to be recognized as successful. We yearn to be seen, to connect, to succeed. We yearn for safety and comfort. It’s meeting those yearnings that fulfills us.

Once we’ve identified our yearnings (which is no small task), we start to engage. Engaging is responding to our yearnings and ceasing to repress or ignore these important drivers. As we engage, we start to change our behavior, connect with others, and feel like we’ve ‘jumped in the game’ of life.

Engaged people are in the game. They’re going for what they want. They have a sense of purpose. If there’s something they don’t understand or know, they speak up. They embrace conflict and see it as a way to move themselves forward. They don’t shy away from tough situations or challenges. To feel passion and vigor, we must be engaged.

For many, this awareness of a need to reengage can come after a period of feeling sidelined. Maybe those around you are achieving their goals and you’re feeling behind, or maybe they don’t even HAVE goals and they’re just satisfied with the status quo. If you’ve surrounded yourself in an environment of goal-getters and driven engagers but you’ve lost your passion, it’s time to reengage and figure out how you can meet your yearnings. Use their engagement to inspire you and drive you. Ask them how they do it, and listen to what they have to say.

If, on the other hand, you’re at a job where everyone seems to be lackluster and phoning it in, maybe you need to rethink your role and position to find something that meets your energy and stimulates your mind.

Revelate

If your office staff and coworkers fall somewhere in between engaged and lackluster, surround yourself with those who are really going for it and pushing themselves. At the same time, figure out new ways you can ignite not only your passion but also the passions of those you work with.

The best way to become a beacon of engagement in the office? By refocusing on your vision—the articulation of not only your goals as an office but your ultimate ideal as a company. If everyone’s stressed out, burnt out and sick of each other, coming in at the New Year after a holiday break can be a great time to really hit the ground running.


Revelating is a term that describes both the awareness of ourselves and of new possibilities as well as the act of revealing ourselves in expression. Revelating can be inspirational, like discovering a new possibility for a course of action…We realize we’ve been managed by…limited thinking that has been holding us back, restricting our happiness and fulfillment. As we start to act differently, revelating helps us start thinking differently.

Transformed! The Science of Spectacular Living


The New Year is a great time to revelate! In fact, the New Year is synonymous with revelating. Now is the time to revelate, discover the new possibilities and how to get there, and look at what you can do to start thinking and acting in a way that will propel you to a year of success!

Work on Your Vision

As you work on revelating and igniting others around you to do the same, let your vision be your guide. Think about your company values. How do you see your role in the company changing this year? What is the big-picture vision for both your career and life in general, and do they sync up?

When we have a vision, it guides us and keeps us in line. It helps us to know if we’re serving our customers and clients, and if we’re actually making a difference in what we do. It’s that knowledge—the awareness that we’re actually mattering to the world and doing something positive—that’s so powerful and motivating. No matter what your line of work, from artist to non-profit coordinator to commercial banker, you have to identify the bigger “why does this work matter?” question, answer it, and work toward that continued goal.

Go forth into the New Year with a renewed sense of focus and a clear vision in your mind. What do you want your life to look like at the close of next year? What changes do you hope to make, and how will you be discovering your yearnings, engaging and revelating by this time next year?


Happy New Year! If you’re looking for more ways to grow and unlock your potential, please join us for our upcoming MORE Life Training, where you’ll learn the skills to unlock your best self.


About the Author

Dr. Bob Wright is an internationally recognized visionary, educator, program developer, leadership and sales executive, best-selling author and speaker. He is a co-founder of the Wright Foundation and the Wright Graduate University.

Defining Company Culture :
Do You Fit In?

 

“Company culture” is a phrase we’re hearing a lot of these days. But what does “culture” really mean in this instance?


If we were talking about a country’s culture, we’d be talking about its customs, people, history, social infrastructure and traditions. So defining company culture sounds straightforward at first. It’s the office environment: the attitudes, personalities, and atmosphere of the office. But truly defining company culture goes beyond even that.

A big part of defining company culture is examining the story that the company tells to the world. For example, what makes the company unique? What is the history of the company? Who are the company’s employees? Who are the company’s customers and how do they feel about the company?  What is the overall “attitude” of the company? Is it hip? Edgy? Serious? Professional? Is there a culture of caring or a culture of competition?

Fitting In, Aligning With, and Defining Company Culture

When we easily understand and naturally fit into our company culture, we tend to take it for granted. It just works. Fitting in feels effortless.

When we don’t fit in, chances are we feel like something HUGE is missing. Like the song says, “You don’t know what you got ‘till it’s gone.” When you work somewhere with a company culture you love, then you move on to a company where you feel like a round peg in a square hole, the importance of a great company culture becomes clear.

A foundation we’ve helped with professional development recently brought in a successor for their Director, Stan. The plan was she would train alongside the Director for a year to “learn the ropes” and then move into his role when he retired. The Director-To-Be, Jamie, was highly qualified, experienced and educated. On paper, she seemed like a perfect fit and a natural for the job.

After about six months we received a desperate call from Stan, asking if we could mentor or train his successor. Several employees had approached him with concerns about Jamie. While these concerns were varied and seemingly unconnected, none of them pointed to a problem with her qualifications…it was something more ambiguous.

Stan said, “I just don’t understand. On paper she seems great. She’s a very nice person and she seems likable enough, but it’s almost like our employees are adverse to her approach to things. The board is happy with her qualifications and direction. I can’t quite explain it, but she just isn’t fitting in. In fact, I have employees threatening to leave our foundation if she’s promoted as my successor. I may have to delay my retirement plan. I don’t know what I did wrong.”

We assured Stan he didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, the succession plan worked out perfectly! How lucky to be able to steer the train back onto the tracks BEFORE it really crashed and burned. This gave us plenty of time to get to the root of the problem.

When meeting with Jamie, after some discussion, it turned out the foundation had a very tight-knit and specific culture.

For example, they kept a plush squirrel on their conference room shelf as a running joke and metaphor for how their team approached new ideas. As in, in the middle of brainstorming sessions, someone would always pop up with an “Oh look a squirrel!” idea and chase off after it. Chasing after new ideas was a vital and an encouraged part of their company culture.

Stan, an Energizer personality type fit in perfectly: he was always excited about new ideas, enthusiastic, and quick to lead and make decisions. He let people run with their plans and share their visions, then helped them find common ground. Employees felt a great deal of personal investment in the foundation, not only because they could see the results of the foundation’s work, but also because they could clearly see their roles and ideas play out. They felt ownership.

Jamie, on the other hand, was a classic Analyzer. She had great credentials and experience, and she could look at reports and data like a crystal ball. She had high standards for perfection and accuracy and was cautious about change. She expected employees to give her frequent updates and she wasn’t allowing for the autonomy they were afforded with Stan. She was frustrated by what she perceived as a lack of focus and planning, while the employees felt stifled and miserable. In some organizations Jamie might have flourished, but in this environment she was floundering.

What was missing? A clear definition, alignment, and understanding of the importance of the existing company culture.

Understanding Your Own Company Culture

Defining your own company culture can seem nebulous. Is it a team where everyone is “in” on the joke? Does it mean everyone gets along as friends? Is it a team built from only certain personality types?

While it would be amazing if we could all find the perfect office environment and corporate culture to align with our different personalities, it’s not so realistic. It’s much more feasible to simply grasp the company culture of your office and learn how to thrive and grow within the environment—bloom where you are planted, so to speak.

In Jamie’s case, it meant she needed to be self-aware enough and willing to do leadership work it would take to get where she needed to be. Fortunately, she right jumped in, working hard to deeply understand her personality and how she fit in with the atmosphere of the office. We used our CARE personality profile to determine her strengths and which areas she needed to pay more attention to. She became much more aware of her interactions with employees and the energy she as putting out. She worked hard to give more autonomy to individual team members and to be more open and willing to hear new “squirrel” ideas.

While Jamie wasn’t going to turn into Stan the Energizer, she was able to play into her other area of strength—her Cooperator side—to find commonalities and share her vision with her fellow team members and to realize each person in the organization had their own vision, ideas, and hopes. Rather than working with a black-and-white/right-or-wrong approach, she was able to find the grey areas where her vision overlapped with theirs.

Jamie worked hard to adapt and to become the leader the foundation needed her to be, and fortunately, Stan was still able to retire on schedule.

When you come into a new office, there’s an existing culture. Depending on the size and structure of the company, you might be able to sway and influence the culture as you grow together, or, you may have to adapt and learn to grow to align with the existing structure. It doesn’t mean changing your personality or getting lost. It means learning how to listen, adapt and grow with those around you.

Finding Your Shared Vision to Grow

One of the best ways to get a handle on the culture of your company is to understand the vision and mission of company leadership. This might be clearly articulated or it might mean you need to have a conversation with your boss. Your goal is to understand the greater, ultimate vision for the organization and how you can help your team achieve it.

Not only will understanding leadership’s vision help you to become more invested and connected to your office, but it will also help you become more valuable and endeared to your boss. After all, every leader wants great people supporting them and working with them to carry out their dreams for the company.

Once you understand the vision of leadership, talk about your own vision and how you can align your career goals to help propel you and the entire office forward. Invest your energy into the company as if it were your very own. Take ownership and leadership over your projects. Offer to go the extra mile and do what it takes to help make your successes the company’s successes.

Don’t shy away from speaking up when you have an idea or when you feel something needs to be addressed. Just because you see something different or have a conflict with a plan doesn’t mean you’re not fitting in. The idea is to find a productive resolution to the problem together. Follow one of our favorite rules of engagement: “assume goodwill” and realize everyone wants the project or company to be successful—but you may just have different ideas of how to get it there.

You represent your company or organization so you reflect its culture. Even if you aren’t a “team player” by nature, when you’re part of an organization, you have to let go of the “my way or the highway” mentality. Focus on the big picture and the ways you can help your company reach its goals.

For more information on defining company culture and leading wherever you are, check out our Career Coaching Program in Chicago, visit our website at www.wrightliving.com, or join us for our next Foundations Training Weekend.


About the Author

Judith

Dr. Judith Wright is a media favorite, sought-after inspirational speaker, respected leader, peerless educator, bestselling author, & world-class coach. She is a co-founder of Wright and the Wright Graduate University.
Loving the content and want more? Follow Judith on Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest!


Liked this post and want more? Sign up for updates – free!

Wright Living is a division of the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential, a leadership institute located in Chicago, Illinois. Wright Living performative learning programs are integrated into the curriculum at Wright Graduate University.

How to Strengthen
Your Social and Emotional Intelligence for
Career Satisfaction

There’s a lot of buzz these days about neuroscience and how it relates to learning and growth. You may have heard of “train your brain” apps, games and challenges designed to boost your social and emotional intelligence.


The idea is that by doing these brain exercises, your brain becomes “stronger” and thus, you become more satisfied and enriched overall. But does a stimulated brain really bring you more career satisfaction and happiness overall?

It’s no secret that social and emotional intelligence play an important role in transformational growth and living. As coaches, we see the way a positive, growth-focused mindset can enable a person to tackle life’s challenges. It can strengthen our relationships, drive us in our careers, and help us reach our leadership goals.

The best leaders are transformational leaders. They focus on growth and work toward a shared vision with their employees. They understand their employees from a social and emotional perspective. They display empathy and honesty, and they focus on a shared human connection. In short: they relate. They get it.

Transformational leaders also have high social emotional intelligence. They can work with and adapt to a variety of people and personality types at work. They don’t get bogged down in day-to-day drama and petty disagreements. They aren’t about their own egos and being right all the time. They are about fighting FOR a path that’s right for the company. They understand their own success is reflected in the success of their team and the group as a whole. They might not be the smartest person in the room, but they know how to bring out the best in those around them, so they have the smartest team.

These emotionally intelligent leaders also experience immense career satisfaction. It’s not because they make the most money or because they have the most power. (Although, they’re almost certainly the identifiable leaders in the office.) It’s because they’re continuously growing and learning new things. They seek new challenges and new experiences. They never stay static.

So how do we get there…?

Complacency Results in Dissatisfaction

As human beings, it’s very easy for us to become complacent and comfortable in our jobs, in our relationships, and in our lives in general. We engage in soft addictions: social media, “zoning out” in front of the television, going out and drinking, or spending money on things that bring us a quick, temporary high but then leave us feeling empty and unfulfilled. We look for fleeting entertainment and cheep satisfaction.

We’re comfortable, but we aren’t stimulated or engaged.

Even those of us in great roles in our jobs can find ourselves wondering, “Is that all there is?” We might get a high when we’re facing a deadline, pushing ourselves to set up a new sales system, or leading a meeting, but most of the time, after a few years of working the same job (even doing the things we do well), we feel like we’re simply phoning it in.

Think of it like training for a marathon. When you’re actively training for a marathon or race, you have to push yourself a little more each day. It’s exciting! You’re striving for your goals and you see results. You have to build new muscles, increase your stamina, and work hard on your speed and distance.

Conversely, if you simply go out your front door, lace up and run the same route every day, eventually you’ll hit a training plateau. You won’t stretch and grow those muscles and keep your body training. When it comes time to run your marathon, you’ll be slow and undertrained. You won’t reach your full potential.

How do we break out of these patterns and habits to achieve career satisfaction—and satisfaction in our lives as a whole?

The Lesson: We must challenge ourselves to grow!

Neuroplasticity: Behind the Scenes of Personal Growth & Satisfaction

The concept of neuroplasticity is one of the most widely accepted theories on social and emotional intelligence, learning and growth. Our brains, just like our bodies, must be continuously stimulated in different and new ways. We have to constantly grow and learn to form new neuropathways and keep our brain functioning at peak condition.

In a comparative study of London cabdrivers vs. London bus drivers, the cab drivers were found to have greater grey matter in the hippocampus of their brain. Why? Because they were constantly learning new routes and responding to new stimuli. Bus drivers, on the other hand, were routinely going through the same experience and thus, showed less activity.

Similarly, when Dr. Itzhak Fried at the University of California, LA replayed a video clip for patients, their neural networks showed the same activity as when they first viewed the clip. Patients also began firing the same neurons when showed associated clips, such as a person along with a landmark. As we form memories and repeat similar experiences, our brains use the same neural pathways. So, to form new neuropaths, we must discover and seek new experiences.


We are designed to transform. We have the amazing gift of neuroplasticity—the ability to build new neural circuitry, new selves and new lives. We can literally change our brains and our minds and what we believe, who we are, and how we live. We can transform.

Our brains are never “happier” than when we are learning new things, stretching, just beyond our current capacities. This is where we build new circuitry and develop mastery.

  Transformed!: The Science of Spectacular Living


Staying Engaged: The Key to Immense Satisfaction

The real secret to staying engaged, stimulated, and emotionally and socially growing is to continuously seek new experiences. We must stretch ourselves and push ourselves outside our comfort zone. Sure, there are apps, games and other “brain training” you can do to work out your brain, but true growth comes from fully engaging and constantly challenging ourselves.

When you walk into a room, do you find ways to listen to everyone there? Do you try to understand their vision and relate? Are you pushing yourself to grow and work on shared benchmarks and milestones?

Find ways to up your social and emotional ante by rolling up your sleeves and jumping in. Embrace new experiences and push yourself beyond your boundaries.

To continue the conversation on engaging with others and to discover ways to bring out your best self, click here to learn more about our next More Life Training. You’ll learn skills to become more alive, more connected, and fully engaged in your life and your career.

Want to boost your career? If you’d like to learn more about what the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential has to offer check out:

Want to improve your sales? The Wright Sales Program is a hands-on, experiential program that provides sales professionals with an opportunity to boost their sales performance through the application of social and emotional intelligence to their selling techniques. [Learn more!]


About the Author

Dr. Bob Wright

Dr. Bob Wright is an internationally recognized visionary, educator, program developer, leadership and sales executive, best-selling author and speaker. He is a co-founder of Wright and the Wright Graduate University.


Liked this post and want more? Sign up for updates – free!

Wright Living is a division of the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential, a leadership institute located in Chicago, Illinois. Wright Living performative learning programs are integrated into the curriculum at Wright Graduate University.

How To Use Your Network
to Increase Your Net Worth

Just like the saying goes, “It’s a small world after all.” We’re all connected in one way or another. Discovering and building on those connections is a powerful way to boost your network—and your career.


 

When many of us think of networking, we think of the typical schmoozing and “work the room” events: shallow, hollow interactions where we hand out business cards. Wouldn’t it be more powerful if you truly LISTENED to someone at a networking event, and took the time to get to know them? If you could walk away with ONE new person with whom you were strategically aligned toward a shared vision, it would make the time and energy spent at the event worth it.

So what about your network? You probably have a LinkedIn profile, a Facebook page, and connections through your office, church and neighborhood. Ask yourself: of those people, how many understand you on a deeper level and share your values and mission? We’re often drawn to those with whom we share a connection, and you just might be surprised how many of those connections you can build on when you really take the time to engage and connect.

A few months ago, communications guru John Davidoff of Davidoff Mission-Driven Business Strategy (my buddy) came into our studio and shared his insights on mission-driven networking. He told a story about how, during the course of just a few lines of conversation, he was able to find a shared connection with someone who had attended the same upstate New York journalism camp as his brother. Through that connection, he was able to build a relationship with that person, plus, they found they were both driven toward a similar mission.

Missions are powerful stuff when it comes to networking. They help us engage and understand how we’re working toward the same outcomes, shared goals and quests.

The Incredible Value of a Common Vision and Mission

Whether you have an office team working on a sales project or you’re working with a client to help them realize their potential and work toward their vision of success, you can tap into the power of understanding a vision. A vision is the picture of your ideal outcome, should your goals and mission align. It’s value-driven. It pushes you toward your achievement and optimizes your performance.

At Wright Living, we’ve devoted ourselves to helping others bring out their best and realize the power of human potential—you, too, can (and should) make helping others part of your mission. All powerful leaders have a mission and vision that they understand, that they can articulate, and that they review often.

One of the suggestions John had (and one of the things we do here at Wright Living) is to repeat your mission at every office meeting and every company function. John has his people repeat their mission every Monday as a way to keep their week’s trajectory on course.

Mission is a powerful driver. It guides all you do. One of your make-or-break moments with your clients is when you show your ability to understand and articulate their mission back to them. This is what separates the “men from the boys,” so to speak. Find the commonalities you share.

Like a Venn diagram, the way your mission, vision and values overlap with your client’s mission, vision and values will be the foundation for your communication. That’s how to build your network. It can be the most powerful tool in your arsenal.

When Your Mission Differs

Not every client (and certainly not every employee) is going to align with you. Listen to the complaints, criticisms and negative talk because there may be valuable truth underneath. The guy you want to “shut up” in the meeting may be telling you just the thing you need to hear—it may be exactly what you need to work on to elevate your business.

When it becomes necessary to steer the conversation or redirect, don’t make it personal. We always like to tell people: when you bring up a problem, you’re responsible for finding the solution. Hold yourself to that. It’s not about bitching and moaning over gripes, it’s about discussing the problem, understanding if it conflicts with the company’s vision, and working on a solution.

There are also times when an employee’s values and vision just won’t sync up with the company’s vision. In that case, what a powerful gift to be able to “liberate” them to find a place where they’re better aligned. So often, it’s seen as a negative thing when someone moves on from their job. But how amazing is it to be in a position to do some reflection and move toward something you really want?

Real Human Connections

Whenever you work with someone, employee, colleague or potential clients, find out what commonalities you share. Engage with them and get to the heart of communication. Work to find balance in each conversation—where you’re listening to what they’re saying and you truly hear them.

Take risks and see where you can help people. We hold back on truly engaging with others because of our own insecurity or because we don’t feel we have enough value. Instead, put yourself out there. Let go of those limiting beliefs and make it a goal to find out where your values overlap.

It’s always a goal of ours to find ways to have greater outcomes. With this goal comes greater responsibilities and yes, great risks. Continue to develop yourself and work toward making the connection with those around you. Help others find ways to bring out their best selves and you will also bring out your own.

Listen to this episode here on BlogTalkRadio or here on iTunes.
Check Out Lifestyle Podcasts at BlogTalkRadio with Wright Living on BlogTalkRadio.

Want to boost your career? If you’d like to learn more about what the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential has to offer check out:

Want to improve your sales? The Wright Sales Program is a hands-on, experiential program that provides sales professionals with an opportunity to boost their sales performance through the application of social and emotional intelligence to their selling techniques. [Learn more!]


About the Author

Dr. Bob Wright

Dr. Bob Wright is an internationally recognized visionary, educator, program developer, leadership and sales executive, best-selling author and speaker. He is a co-founder of Wright and the Wright Graduate University.


Liked this post and want more? Sign up for updates – free!

Wright Living is a division of the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential, a leadership institute located in Chicago, Illinois. Wright Living performative learning programs are integrated into the curriculum at Wright Graduate University.

Your Life, Your Career:
Unleash YOU
in the New Year

Anyone can have a job. When I was growing up, people in town talked about their jobs—day in and day out, they went through the motions, earned a paycheck and brought it home.


There’s nothing wrong with a job, but a job doesn’t bring the satisfaction of a career.

A job pays your bills, but a career unlocks your path and helps to shape your journey. Your career vision may not be clearly laid out in front of you. Many of us don’t have a clue what we want to do until we’re actually doing it. Your career should be satisfying and fulfilling, and help you bring out your best.

So you may be saying, “But Bob, I’m sick of my career,” or “My career feels hollow and doesn’t challenge me in the right ways.” If that’s the case, you’re probably frustrated and feeling defeated. In 2016, let’s recommit to being our most alive. Let’s bring out vibrancy and the satisfaction of success that transformation and growth can bring. Revisit your vision and boost your social and emotional intelligence to refocus your leadership. Find your voice!

Happy people are happy. Choose to be happy, trustworthy and truthful. Be someone others can count on. It’s not about having the highest degree or the strongest pedigree. There are people with MBAs from Harvard, Stanford, or Northwestern who still feel dissatisfied with their careers. Choose to engage and make a positive role for yourself. People will notice your greatness.

You can learn more about transformation and how to jumpstart your personal growth by reading our book, Transformed!: The Science of Spectacular Living.
Connecting with Clients in 2016

If you’re building up clients, either in a new career or if you’re just trying to reenergize and boost your current career, you might feel yourself holding back. Interactions might seem shallow, and you may not know if you’re truly connecting with your customers, clients, and those lives you’re touching. This is especially important in the coaching field, but can apply to any career.

First of all, you have to show interest in every single client. Listen to them. Ask them what they want, and don’t be scared if the answer isn’t what you think you want to hear. Feedback is vital, even if it means you’ve got to work harder or change something to please your customers.

If you find you hold back because of a fear of rejection, you need to push past it. Set yourself up to build the muscle of being on your own side. Yes, it might hurt to hear a client doesn’t love your work, but roll past it, learn from it, and use it to grow.

Clients will reject you. That’s okay. The way to deal with it is to simply have more clients and connections. If you only have one customer contact per day, the customer becomes too precious and the fear of scarcity kicks in. If you have five or six, then relying on just one client to make or break you becomes a non-issue.

Let go of the fear by building up more connections—even those you don’t think will go anywhere or those you KNOW will reject you. Flex the muscle of being on your own side and use it to make you stronger. Explore why your clients are dissatisfied and consider what you can learn from the interaction.

Being More Productive in 2016

How many of us are on self-imposed deadlines. And how many of us keep giving ourselves extensions? Stop! Enlist some accountability and support, and you’ll find you’ll ramp up your productivity.

We’ve talked about mindfulness and meditation as ways to boost your productivity. Let go of soft addictions. Stop checking your Facebook and social media twenty times a day. Stop being a slave to your email. Look at your day, prioritize, and approach each task mindfully and fully.

When you make a deadline, stick to it. If you’re having a hard time holding yourself accountable, find a way to MAKE yourself accountable. Put your money where your mouth is. Write a check to an organization you oppose. (If you’re very conservative, for example, write a check to the Democratic Party or if you’re very liberal, write a check to the NRA.) Find a friend to hold the check for you and to send it if you don’t make your deadline. It will hurt, and I guarantee it will make you hold fast to your timeline.

At the same time, in your push for productivity, be sure you don’t push so hard you end up doing everything and burning yourself out. This can be difficult for managers, especially if you’ve been burned by mistakes and misguided employees in the past.

Rather than trying to manage all the irons in the fire, take a step back. Put on a self-imposed gag order or restraint. Give your team clear job descriptions and clear orders. Direct your team to take care of the problem and trust them to do it. If they can’t, then it’s time to find a team who can. It can be hard to let go of control, especially for Regulators, who want to control all the reins and make sure everything is going their way. Loosen your grip and allow your employees to share your vision and succeed.

Unleash YOU!

As you look to boost your career and amp up your satisfaction in 2016, give yourself permission to stop holding back. Allow yourself to become fully engaged. Stop the fear of what others will think or how they might reject you. Let go of your self-consciousness and go for it.

Too often WE are the very thing holding ourselves back. We think now isn’t the right time to start doing what we want or that we have to go full-in and put everything on the line to get there. Sometimes, it can feel like if we don’t get all the way there or if we “fail,” then we should just give up and throw in the towel.

Instead, allow yourself room to grow. Bite off pieces, set goals, and take steps towards transformation. It doesn’t happen all at once—it’s a process. You just need to give yourself permission to start and the tools you need to succeed.

You can gain these tools by joining us for our first More Life Training workshops, where you’ll learn skills to become more alive, more connected, and fully engaged in your life and your career. Bring out your best self in 2016.

Listen to this episode here on BlogTalkRadio or here on iTunes.
Check Out Lifestyle Podcasts at BlogTalkRadio with Wright Living on BlogTalkRadio.

If you want to know more about how to work on your own social and emotional intelligence and growth, click here to learn more about our More Life Training. Don’t miss our transformative high-value workshops. Join us to discover the tools you need to go forth and ignite your world. [Learn more!]
Want to boost your career? If you’d like to learn more about what the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential has to offer check out:

Want to improve your sales? The Wright Sales Program is a hands-on, experiential program that provides sales professionals with an opportunity to boost their sales performance through the application of social and emotional intelligence to their selling techniques. [Learn more!]


About the Author

Bob-300x250-1

Dr. Bob Wright is an internationally recognized visionary, educator, program developer, leadership and sales executive, best-selling author and speaker. He is a co-founder of Wright and the Wright Graduate University.


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Blog post image courtesy: Flickr user v1ctor.

Wright Living is a division of the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential, a leadership institute located in Chicago, Illinois. Wright Living performative learning programs are integrated into the curriculum at Wright Graduate University.

Stress at Work:
Here’s How to Deal

We’ve talked before about the damaging effects of stress at work and the healthy ways and unhealthy ways we can choose to deal with it.


Healthy ways to deal with stress include: meditating, keeping yourself energized, organized, and on-task, giving yourself a break, and most importantly, fully engaging in the task at hand.

People often think that stress means you have too few hours in the day and too long a list to tackle. More often, stress comes because we’re distracted. We’re giving in to passive behavior. We feel it’s easier to just complain and ruminate on what’s bothering us, than to speak up and say something about it.

Just like our muscles, our social-emotional skills need to be flexed and exercised to get stronger and more efficient. When a muscle is tense and tight, it can’t ever fully relax. But when you’re engaging, stretching and using those muscles, they relax and become looser and more flexible.

We have to do the same thing to our social-emotional muscles. We need to fully engage. Stop holding back when things are bugging you—speak up and say something. Don’t participate in eye-rolling and bad attitudes, because that’s not going to make things any better. In fact, you’re going to end up more stressed out and more exhausted. Tasks will seem even more insurmountable.

How to Be Less Stressed in the Boardroom

What are some of our most stressful moments at work? Meetings. Interactions with our coworkers. Why is that? These should be some of our best opportunities to engage—to share our vision with management, and to get energized and pumped up for the next task.

Instead, what happens in meetings? We allow one or two people to get us off track. Someone starts complaining or someone’s annoying habits and traits start to get under our skin. Suddenly, we’re not even focused on the purpose and message of the meeting—or worse—management and those running the meeting have lost their focus.

It’s up to every one of us to engage and get things back on track. Speak up, and let your coworkers and mangers know you’d like to get the conversation back on track. Ask to revisit the desired outcome and the purpose of the meeting, and repeat the objectives as you understand them. Sometimes those actions alone can keep things from running off the rails and getting stressful.

The worst thing that could happen? Well, you could be fired…but I haven’t heard too many cases where someone was fired for trying to get a meeting back on track. (Would you really want to work for a company like that anyway?) Really though, we hold back because we don’t want people to think we’re being “pushy” or “a jerk,” or we’re just afraid of what people think of us. The question is: are you really being true to yourself by holding back? Are you being honest and holding on to your values and integrity?

It’s better to speak up and let others know when something is bothering you, than to just let it become a “bitch-fest” where everyone voices their complaints and gripes, and attacks one another. Take back the focus and you’ll bring out your natural leadership.

What To Do When You Lose Focus

When it comes to being productive, we can end up our own worst enemy. I’ve talked before about the importance of meditation and having downtime—those activities outside of work where you can fully recharge. To keep your focus on your to-do list and the task at hand, you need these head-clearing activities.

Other times, distractions (like the Internet, social media, and email) can creep into our day and destroy our focus. Rather than allowing these tools to make us more productive, we let them get in our way.

Try something new. When you’re ready to start your day, don’t even check your email. Tackle your biggest, hardest task first, and get it out of the way. Then, you can let yourself look at your email and do the things you need to do to invite others into your mind-space.

People who are the most productive tackle difficult things first. They don’t necessarily work harder, but they work smarter. They keep their focus, they take breaks to meditate, they have outlets, and they nourish their yearnings with personal time and activities important to them. They don’t go back and forth responding to twenty emails every morning before they tackle important stuff.

We all have the power to make our work less stressful. By fully engaging and staying focused on the task at hand, participating in meetings, and speaking up and sharing our vision with our coworkers, we can make work a place of accomplishment, where we feel good about what we’re doing and ourselves. We can achieve goals that make us feel more powerful, more in control, and more engaged. We can find opportunities to be successful. Stress is the opposite of success. Keep yourself highly-focused and you’ll leave work with a sense of fulfillment each day.

Listen to this episode here on BlogTalkRadio or here on iTunes.
Check Out Lifestyle Podcasts at BlogTalkRadio with Wright Living on BlogTalkRadio.

If you want to know more about how to work on your own social and emotional intelligence and growth, join us for our More Life Training. Don’t miss our transformative high-value weekend of learning foundational skills and reawakening your social and emotional intelligence: the primary variable indicating career success. [Learn more!]

Want to boost your career? If you’d like to learn more about what the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential has to offer check out:

Want to improve your sales? The Wright Sales Program is a hands-on, experiential program that provides sales professionals with an opportunity to boost their sales performance through the application of social and emotional intelligence to their selling techniques. [Learn more!]


About the Author

Bob-300x250-2

Dr. Bob Wright is an internationally recognized visionary, educator, program developer, leadership and sales executive, best-selling author and speaker. He is a co-founder of Wright and the Wright Graduate University.


Liked this post and want more? Sign up for updates – free!

Blog post image courtesy: Flickr user starsalive.

Wright Living is a division of the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential, a leadership institute located in Chicago, Illinois. Wright Living performative learning programs are integrated into the curriculum at Wright Graduate University.